Sometimes I see myself in characters on TV shows. Sometimes it’s funny, like Ben on Parks and Rec loving everything ‘90s. Or exaggerated, like Monica on Friends excited to use her label maker. Or even sweet, like Pam from The Office being too reserved to confess her love for Jim.

But, as I watched Modern Family last night, it was like looking in a mirror. Claire, the mom, is faced with an opportunity where she will be away from her family for the day. She retorts with, “But who will be here to…” and runs a laundry list of family tasks. Humorously, her husband Phil blankly says, “Wow, it must be difficult being a single mom.”

What I saw was the demands I put on myself as a wife and now as a mother. I go further than taking on the responsibility of organizing my household. Instead, I put burdens on myself and completely discount my husband’s efforts.

For someone who grew up in the aftermath of the modern women’s right movement, I think we have jumped too far. We aimed for “I can do it all” instead of “We can do it together.”

I have an amazing husband, who is excited to be a dad. We share and sort household tasks. We both work. We love each other and we love our daughter. So why, during certain circumstances, do I feel like I’m doing this on my own?

For those of us who are married, with amazing husbands willing to partner with us in life, why are we trying to do it alone? Personally, I’ve learned to not expect everything to be done my way and to ask for help when I’m feeling overwhelmed.

Wives, let’s remember that we signed up to do life together with our husbands. Now let’s start acting like it.